If you want your wife to change her mind about the divorce, you’re in a tough spot. Chances are, she doesn’t really seem to want to work on her marriage, let alone hear how much he’s willing to change things to keep her happy. But he doesn’t have to stay like this. After all, if you don’t do your best, then you really have no chance of getting your wife back. Right?

So if you want to change your wife’s mind about divorce but she doesn’t seem interested, where do you start? First, you need to give your wife space. Don’t try to directly convince her to stay with you if she doesn’t want to right now. Don’t fight with her about her divorce and don’t tell her that you will never give her one. The best thing you can do is let her have her freedom right now.

Why does giving your wife space help you change your mind about getting divorced? He stops the power struggle. If you tell your wife that you will never give her a divorce, she will only make her want to show you that she doesn’t need your permission. And honestly, if she really wants a divorce from her, you can’t stop her. The only way to stop the divorce is to make her want to stop it. And if you’re fighting all the time, all she’ll want to do is get away from you.

If you give your wife space right now, it will give her a chance to think about what is really going on. Even if she looks like she wants a divorce and she’s set on it, you don’t spend your life with someone and then have no second thoughts. So the best way to grow those second thoughts is to show her how things could be if she stayed. Try to be as nice to her as possible. Give him time alone. Let her see what life is really like without you. Use that time to work on yourself so you can stay as happy and grounded as possible during this time. And whatever you do, don’t fight her.

When you feel like you are about to start arguing with your wife about the divorce, do everything you can to stop it. That doesn’t mean fawning over her or promising that things will change right now. You’re just going to try to keep everything as enjoyable and drama-free as possible. You can work on your relationship once you get her on board again. Just do your best to listen, be strong, and if you’re angry, vent somewhere else.

If your wife sees that you are changing the pattern of your marriage, you will be well on your way to getting her to change her mind about divorce. It’s a long process, but think of it this way: Divorce doesn’t happen overnight. You have more time than you think.